So said God, Exodus XX:13,
Don't Steal! - or really, you will not steal. It's right after don't murder and don't commit adultery. I should have listened.
Alas! I went astray, and in a moment of weakness downloaded a program crack for some music notation software. Woe! t'was a great and terrible plague that was released upon my laptop - an irremovable rootkit virus. It seems that the Lord-God has updated his repertoire of punishment for 58th century cyber-crime (it's the year 5769 according the the Hebrew calendar.) A full system restore was in order, but first I needed to travel from my far off village to the nearby settlement of Be'er Sheva באר שבה in order to acquire CD R's for file saving.
A day's journey by camel, or 25 minutes by bus, Be'er Sheva is found in the northern Negev and is the capital of our region. Upon arrival I realized that I wasn't the only one out here in the desert making stops at Pirate Bay. It seems the whole district was in need of a little discipline. But God isn't strictly techie these days. He still has a taste for some old school wrath. So, a plague of sand was unleashed upon the southern residence for their transgression of downloading pirated software.
This is the sun.
Walking outside in a sand storm was an interesting experience. You get sand in your eyes, mouth, ears, nose and hair. Even in the mall, where I sought refuge to wait out the storm, sand was everywhere. So lesson learned: Don't be cheap. Pay for the software or be wary. Next time it could be frogs.
After don't steal there is another order לא-תַעֲנֶה בְרֵעֲךָ עֵד שָׁקֶר. Something like: you will not answer on your fellow man in the manner of a lying witness. But now that I've got some old fashioned fear of G-d in me, I'll play it safe and say “Don't lie!” As such, allow me to correct some previous entries.
On 18.12.08 or 12/18/08 (that never stops being confusing) I published a post entitled “Porcupine Slippers.” It has since come to my attention that there is an error here. I thought the Hebrew word קיפוד Kipod was porcupine. This turns out to be incorrect, mostly. It seems that Kipod is really hedgehog while Darban דַּרְבָּן is porcupine. While many Israelis use Kipod for both, those that wish to speak correctly make a distinction. Of course those that make a distinction say Dorban which is really a spur or quill while Darban is porcupine. Though, it seems to change according to which dictionary you use. I've checked several for both animals. Some have both listed under Kipod while others have only hedgehog. Also, a “Sea Hedgehod” קיפוד ים is a sea urchin and an “Ant Hedgehog” קיפוד נמלים is listed as a porcupine anteater aka. an echidna – a creature that looks like the result of an inter-species orgy between a porcupine, hedgehog and anteater. The name Echidna comes from Greek mythology - she was the mother of all monsters and spawned every major horrible monster in the Greek myths. Finally, Kipi's true roots are reveled.
The other subject I'd like to address is of course beer. In “Booze and Don't” I implied that there are only two Israeli beers. This is not correct and there are two more I must mention – again, one positive one negative. First there is “Shandy” שנדי, a lemony girl drink if there ever was one.
I think it's a blend of Maccabee, Sprite, and camel piss. It contains 2% alcohol. That makes 3.2 beer look like a Belgian trippel. Honestly, just get a lemonade if that's what you really want. It's more respectable than pretending like you're really drinking.
The other is נשר or Eagle Beer. 
This is cheap swill, which I like. Probably because I'm cheap. For around $1.00 or ₪4.00 you can buy a half liter bottle which you can drink anywhere you like. No open container laws here. I like to drink beer at the mall or at the bus station, give's you something to do while your waiting. Just try and keep the sand out.
Yafo's name comes from the Western Semitic root for beauty. It is one of the oldest ports in the world and lives up to it's etymological origin. Note that all three versions of its name (Hebrew/English/Arabic) are pronounced slightly different - just to confuse you a bit.
